She may embarrass him in
front of his friends and refuse to give him more pocket money. But when her son
grows up, he will marry a woman just like her.
When it comes to choosing a
wife, a man really is drawn to someone cut from the same cloth as his mother.
A study of high-achieving
young men revealed their wives were highly likely to have been educated to the
same level as their mothers.
Those brought up by a working
mother were also far more likely to marry someone with a well-paid job.
While the results may partly
be explained by social class, researchers believe they also show the truth of
the old adage that men tend to marry their mothers. Nearly 80% of those whose
mothers held a bachelor’s degree had tied the knot with a woman educated to a
similar level.
Two-thirds of those whose
mothers were educated to masters or doctoral levels had wives with equivalent
qualifications.
“These young men look up to
their mothers as role models,” said researcher, “They grew up in a family where
their mothers were educated women.”
“When they make their own
choices about someone who they think will be a good wife in the future, or a
good mother, they go back to their role models.
“The conventional wisdom is
that if men marry their mothers, that’s a bad thing – their wives are just
going to run around after them and pick up their socks. “But for this
generation, the mothers are serving as role models.”
The study is not the first to
provide evidence that our parents shape our preferences for partners.
Those who had difficult
relationships with their mothers tend to go for women with different looks.
Modeling their choice of mate
on their parents’ successful marriage may help a child increase their own
chances of a happy partnership.
Children from happy marriages
may also believe that a man who looks like their father or a woman who looks
like their mother is more likely to be a good parent.
Equally, those with bad
childhood memories may actively avoid a partner who reminds them of their
parents.
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